So, I know if you are a tv fanatic, you have either heard of or watched this series. I watched it this week and although I am not a big fan of tv series, I was hooked to this one. I binged watched it over the course of 3 days. I lost sleep because of the late nights I stayed up watching this series; it’s that good. But in addition to how ridiculously good it is, there are a lot of lessons to be had with this series. I will try to give you those lessons without telling you the whole show. But there are some spoilers so if you don’t want to know anything before you watch, then DO NOT read the remainder of this post:
The first lesson in this series is one about how childhood trauma can affect your adult relationships. In this series, the Duke played by the incredibly handsome black actor, Rege Jean Page, is tortured by the trauma he experienced at the hands of his father who basically abandoned him because he stuttered. The father called him an “imbecile” when he heard him speak for the first time and banished him to be taken care of by the help. The Duke was then taken under the wing of his mother’s close friend who teaches him how to speak without the impediment so he could join elite society and win the approval of his father. Well, when the son and father came to meet again when the boy was older, it didn’t work to save their relationship. The father ridiculed him again and wanted nothing to do with him because to him, the boy wasn’t perfect enough. The father’s disapproval never left the Duke even as an adult and he couldn’t even have a healthy relationship because of it. In fact, he almost lost the love of his life because he didn’t want to have children due to what he endured with his father. She fortunately was a gracious woman who put up with his baggage and loved him through it. How often do we as women do this? It’s interesting how we are always up for the challenge of healing a broken man. In this series, it paid off but in real life, sometimes it doesn’t.
Have you healed from your childhood trauma? Is there something from your past that is holding you back from being able to move forward single or in a relationship? It is important that we acknowledge our childhood trauma so we can work on healing it. Be sure to get therapy so you can do this trauma work and learn to identify the unhealthy patterns in yourself that might be impacting your ability to find healthy relationships.
Another lesson I got from this series is how some women often fall in the trap of thinking that a man’s status is what they need to elevate them in society. In this series, the young women from two prominent families vie for the attention of eligible bachelors in order to be “kept” women and continue the lives they are accustomed. Sounds familiar doesn’t it? When I thought of this, what came to mind were shows like The Bachelor or other dating reality shows where women fight, lie, and manipulate to get a man that is coveted because of his status. Interestingly enough, the breakout stars in Bridgerton were two young women who defy the expectations of their society by challenging the norms. One is secretly the creator of a gossip magazine, which is the talk of elite society. She had to hide her identity under an alias because back then it was frowned upon for women to be writers. The other woman challenges her sisters to imagine a life where women don’t need men and can forge ahead on their own. Of course, she is met with criticism and eye rolls.
We as women tend to struggle with self-confidence and our belief in ourselves. We are afraid to do new and unconventional things because we don’t think we will be successful. We often look for outside validation or the support from a man. I am quite aware of this aspect of myself and fight it every day. I, unlike the young writer in Bridgerton, will not hide my talent from others. For so long, I was scared to share my writing talent and would second guess my posting of different books I had written on social media. But the closer I get to 40 (I will be 40 in April), the more I don’t care. I don’t care if I get a lot of likes or shares on my posts. I post because I am proud of my achievement in writing (I have written several books since 2019) and now have a collection of books on mental health. I have taken a page out of this tv show and will continue to forge ahead and write even if I don’t gain notoriety from it. Me starting my own business is about taking a leap of faith despite not knowing what lays ahead. It is about taking risks and being confident that I will do well with or without the reassurance or support of my loved ones. I hope that anyone that is scared to take a gamble on themselves will come to this point one day so that they can pursue their own dreams. In fact, I write children’s books that speak to this very thing because I believe it is important to plant these seeds in children from early. Make sure to stop by my online shop to browse my books here.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my take on Bridgerton and the themes I could relate to. Please feel free to share your own thoughts on this series and your take on it as it relates to your life. I welcome all feedback!